Money is the badge of innocence in Heath

Several months ago, a man came out of a bar in Southgate, got into his car and started driving to his home in Newark. Before he got out of the Heath city limits, a police cruiser which had been waiting in the parking lot watching for potential drunks, stopped him for ... no light over his license plate.

Unfortunately for this man, who was not drunk, he was not a part of the much-celebrated Mopar Super Cruise event held recently in Heath during which drivers take over Ohio 79 to parade their cars, rev their engines and do burn-outs, according to an Advocate report.

"Some people help the burnouts along by pouring a bit of water in the road. Soon after, the trademark white cloud appears behind the car and, like nitro in a drag racer, the adrenaline pumps up drivers and spectators alike."

Also, according the the same report, spectators pelted Heath police cruisers with plastic bottles and trash.

How do they manage to get away with this, you ask?

It's called money and it's for the enrichment of Heath merchants. So this is okay.

Wink wink, says the Advocate. Check it out:

"The event also signals that even in our sometimes overly legalized world we have not fully retreated into a cocoon trying to shield ourselves from every possible pitfall.

"Of course, this isn't a license for a free-for-all. But as long as everyone cooperates with an eye toward safety and respect for law enforcement, this slice of American life and spirit should have a long road ahead of it."

Quite different treatment to drivers than Heath police hiding in the bushes to capture some quiet, sober patsy without a bulb over his license plate.